When I was 5 years old teachers were upset because I already knew all what they were trying to teach me, leading me to a state of mind where school became useless. By the time I turned 13 evaluations decided my intelligence crossed the border of a 20 year old man and if well developed, I’d eventually become a brilliant and succesful man. None of this facts took in consideration the social implications of such case.
I’m always alone, ever since I can recall. Always floating across my head from one point to another and over-analizing every single thing that may aware my interests. While gathering tremendous ammounts of knowledge by reading nearly anything written that may cross my path (including signs and even while driving) I’m usually forced to keep most of these facts I know to myself. Reason why? Not everybody (if not nobody) seems to be interested in Edison, Einstein or psicologic dissorders.
“Do it yourself” taught by mother, and even father sometimes; I barely look for support (never meaning I wouldn’t do much better with or even need it most of the times) in others, usually excusing this behavior with an attitude of “if you don’t do it for yourself, no one else will do it for you”, like a man once told me “you gotta do what you gotta do… ’cause nobody else’s gonna do it for you”. Concequences? Lack of social touch, social skills and most mostly-accepted-by-society points of view.
All in all, I will not lie, I am thankful and very aware of most of my skills and talents. Wether towards visual arts or music or even written words. I know I’m an avid speaker (when publically speaking, not one-on-one) and absolutely guided-by-thought man (a dissagreable reason of pride). But don’t think this has no toll on me.
Day after day I’ve jumped closer to the conclusion that I am in fact, a dying breed. Although my outside is the same of any human being, inside I am something completely different. Something your regular human being sometimes is uncapable to understand. Thus bringing me to a destination where neither I understand those surrounding me nor they can understand me.
